My Heart of Darkness

I don’t really want to be the guy who complains about his girl problems, but I need to get it off my chest. When I meet a seemingly nice all around girl everything flows alright in the beginning. Then when I ask her if she wants to hang out over the weekend the result is that: they say the don’t like to go out (and have fun), they just got a boyfriend yesterday, she might be out of town, she has “a lot” of “homework”, their parents won’t let them, or simply no.  Why is it that all the girls I meet and want to be with end up playing me the fool? They play around with my feelings when I’m being serious. This lost cause is beginning to form a Heart of Darkness in me that it’s starting to be difficult for me to see life through my old lens. The lens I once had freshman year where everyone was your friend, no one cared about having a boyfriend or girlfriend because we were too busy working hard and enjoying our days! I miss that lens, the new shows reality naked for what it is. It’s mean, backstabbing, lying, unfriendly, lonesome, and desperate. I was planning on going to formal dances at our school with a “date”, but now that I see the truth of it all, maybe I’ll reconsider; that side’s looking pretty good right now. Homecoming was one of the worst experiences ever last year, I won’t say what happened, all you know is that I had an awful time with no date, some good friends, not most. It’s not the reality of life that has caused me to change, believe me I know the reality of life in most places far away, it’s the other side of high school that I really hate; I’m sure we all do. When I did find the perfect girl it turns out that I can’t have her, she is too young my parents said to me. Wow so close yet so far away.  This song is one of my favorite by REO Speedwagon, a group from the 80s, hope you like it. The thing about music is when it hits you, you feel no pain.